IS HE SOMEONE YOU NEED? by Counselor Adofoli​

"I am dating a guy I love so much but he treats me anyhow; lies to me, cheats, and hardly makes time for me". Whenever I hear such statements, I always wonder why they can't leave, but one of the text messages which got me baffled this morning was this "I am dating a guy who cheats and lies to me but anytime I see him, I feel happy and okay. I always want to see him. Is he someone I can marry?

Well, as much as I agree that ladies are not toys to play with, or free food sample to taste or bubble gum to be spat out when the sweetness is gone; I also disagree with ladies who see men as solutions to their needs, as their ATM and once they finish emptying it they abandon them.

If you are looking for a relationship that leads to a lasting marriage, it is very important you fall in love with your life before you fall in love with anyone. Have your peace, happiness, comfort and freedom before going out there.

When you know yourself and what you need, it’s easy to find it when you see one. The trouble is, a lot of us don't know what we want or need.

There is a difference between "I want you" and "I need you". I call them Standards and Preferences. Don't get them twisted. Standards are things you need in a partner whilst Preferences are things you want in a partner. Sometimes what you want is not what you need. I may want you but I don't need you.

Know that when love is real, it doesn't lie, cheat, pretend, hurt or make you feel unwanted. It's supposed to be a cure to all your worries. When someone is in love with you, become their need not want.

No calls, no texts, nothing and you are there thinking about them like crazy? This is the time; you have to realize that some people can only stay in your heart but not in your life.

It doesn't matter what they promised you or how they painted the future to you, or even how nice they were when they first met you. Sometimes hell is in the person who promised you something heavenly and the devil is good at pretending to be everything you want.

Life only comes around once, so do what makes you happy and be with whoever makes you smile, someone who is afraid to lose you. Never cry for the person who hurts you. Just smile and say "thanks for giving me a chance to find someone better than you".

Anytime you feel inadequate, unloved and unworthy, just remember whose child you are. In case you don't know, you are the child of the Most High King, so straighten your crown, assume your throne and reign on.

In conclusion "Stop lying to each other; tell the truth, for we are parts of each other and when we lie to each other we are hurting ourselves'. - Ephesians 4:25 (TLB). And in Proverbs 11:1 (CEV) Even "The Lord hates anyone who cheats, but He likes everyone who is honest".

Please share with your friends, someone out there needs this.

Thank you for reading. This has been your Counselor and Motivator.


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